Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Silence and Tears..

This is the acceptance entry for being awarded the Perfect poet (week40)!! Also, I would like to nominate rajlakshmi for her entry: Song of eternal wait !

This Poem was awarded the Poem of the Week Award here:  
Week 7, Gooseberry Garden!

As she lay her eyes on the sparkling diamond in his hand,
she could hardly believe, it was happening & she would need, for him, a band!
Little did she realise, it wasn't for her,
until he said-" What would she say? Tell me, as if you it were..."

The smile faded, the sparkle in her eyes died..
In the end, it was her who cried.
Forever alone, she felt herself to be..
incapable she'd become to feel the love that everyone else could see..

She said to the empty heart in her sleep,
"how do I 'move on' when in remembrance I weep.."
She'd lived all she wanted to,
there was no purpose, nothing more to do..

She moved to a new city; changed workplaces,
yet everything still carried his traces..
what he would have said, what he'd have done..
The same scent, the same voice in her head; With him everywhere, how far could she run?

She stopped one day, sat by the waves,
thinking of him and what she craves..
It wasn't love, it wasn't him, it wasn't memories, not the promises;
she just wanted his presence like water in the crevices..

that comes and goes, but never stays..
the shore never has any hopes to raise
like the wind that blows
the flake that snows
they come and go,
but, never in parting have any sorrow to show.

To freedom to call and to talk,
to hear little trivia on the long long walk,
to see him everyday & to share ghost stories for hours,
bicker over tea or coffee & whether he's really from Mars!

She's living in a vaccum, with no rescue,
There's only darkness, but maybe with a silver hue!

My entry for:
Poetry Picnic Week 7: Love and Loss
Gooseberry Garden: http://gooseberryygoespoetic.blogspot.com

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Happiness maybe..

Many a times I sit and wonder,
why we act and then ponder!
its never the other way round...
the world is one messed up ground!

You know it would be so much simpler,
if we could just live without looking like a crimpler..
like the famous Buffet and Gate,
the eyes of everyone sans all hate!

Alas, reality checks are but missing,
and don't come without the reactive hissing!
When seldom do we think..
Then it's natural that often we sink..

There are regrets and rememberences,
the rest are just futile wishes..
seeking the world for happiness,
when it really lies in loneliness!

Be with yourself today,
and you'll be on the happiness way!

This poem has been published as a part of Thursday Poets Rally, Week 40

Thursday, March 17, 2011

To have loved and lost..

He is an enigma,
an intellect and decidely indifferent,
She is vivacious, a lesser enigma,
woman & child at once, yet a little distant.

Furtive glances are exchanged,
coffee outings are framed,
pitter patter of raindrops is heard,
Everything is said without a word..

More intimate now, they read morning papers together,
go shopping for groceries in the most romantic weather.
They look perfect, are inseparable
losing each other, the thought is unbearable.

Another day, another story,
there he is, with someone, maybe temporary.
She wonders, one arguement could break us?
Cries & shouts, could he really transgress?

To get him back, she moves heaven and earth,
he cannot see what she is worth..
She resigns, wishes him well,
in solitude, her eyes bleed & swell..

She sees them everyday, share meals & rides,
workplace isn't always paradise.
No one to answer her plea,
She is miles away from the hint of glee..

Repeated efforts and all come to a naught,
but really,to have loved and lost?
Soon they will tie the knot,
while she is torn in colors for the cot..

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

A visit to the neighbour next door!

The 2230 Goa bound Volvo is now stopping for the fourth time. This time its for tea in Goa at 0715. The next few hours are the most difficult I think, with no beach in sight and nothing different about this ride than the one in Morni hills in Chandigarh. Oh, how I want to see a beach now. As my co-passenger is comfortably asleep, wrapped in the beach towel in the numbing temperature of the bus, I think to myself that its probably after a wait of years, ever since the failed plan when I was still in school, that I am finally getting to Goa..

The feeling is unparalleled. You know when you really want something for years and then one fine day, you just get it. You don't even know how to revel in the joy of it all. You think there hasn't been much time to celebrate, but this journey has really given me the time to think, assess, thank and celebrate.

Getting off at the Mapusa stand, it is the sweltering heat that de-freezes him instantly and his complaints begin. Ignoring it all, I want take a good first look at Goa. Before anything registers, a hoard of taxi and auto drivers surround us, let the bargaining begin.

The auto looks like a little vintage piece, with doors on either side complete with the slider windows, alongwith curtains separating the driver from us! Very cozy, unlike Goa as I will learn shortly. With no beach in sight, I'm beginning to lose patience. But, just as I'm about to alight, I see before myself, the vast expanse of the deep blue waters stretching till infinity and the warm beige carpet of sand welcoming me.      

As I walk towards the water, the sand tries hard to contain me where I am. I reach the shore, but my co-passenger insists we check in and come back later. It's as if I'm being punished, inflicted with this strange pain. I return, after 60 minutes of deprivation. This time, I run towards it, with such passion, that only the salt of it all brings me back. It is bliss, or something more, I dont know.

What I do know is: It felt pristine when the waves touched my feet for the first time. I came to know what it was to have earth move beneath me. I called out to myself, repeating one word, "Goddess", a zillion times. I noticed shells, that waves would leave and take back again. I wrote my name only to see it get washed away. I tasted sea. I held sand in my palm. I had a dream come true. It was overwhelming & I'll sum it up in this urdu couplet:

Jalwa baqadr-e-zarf-e-nazar dekhte rahe
Kya dekhte hum unko magar dekhte rahe

Many hours, perhaps a day later..

Trying to lounge in the beach bed at the shack, I was not alone. Accompanying me were the water sports gang, the tattoo artists, the braider, the fruit seller, the little girl with papads of all shapes, the sellers with shells, books, video CDs, hair accessories & stoles! The beach was a sight to behold with the swarm of foreigners; trying to get that much wanted tan; blend in effortlessly with the chuda-clad couples, the castle builders, the India SA match watchers & groups of friends everywhere.

I get my adrenaline rush with para-sailing amidst hallucinated glimpses of Salman Khan as I ride the water scooter. The bumper ride ended before it could start, and the banana ride leaves me breathless and alkaline! The butterfly tattoo on my ankle is nearly washed away in my joyous chapp-chapp with the sea & its waves. The braider manages to get the orange, purple and fluroscent green hue in my hair as I sip on another bottle of Coke, not Kings beer!

It is great to lie here and then to just lie here. The sojourns around town for shopping aren't very therapeutic as the responses I get are rude and arrogant especially the night market! So, it's great to just lie here. It's peaceful even though it's not serene. It's beautiful, even though it's not crystal clean. It is breath taking. It's my favourite neighbour.

Monday, March 14, 2011

Land of Dreams...

A city lined with intricate blue & red mosques,
what a feeling it was, walking on the cobbled sidewalks!
& then there was 56.6 metres of dome height,
complete with the golden hue of the diwali kinds light!

The local band impressing us with "awara hun"
and us posing as pyar hua iqrar hua in the rainy noon!
The boards have weird dotted alphabets for names,
but locals give us all directions & click us for picture frames!

Great bargains at the bazaars,
oh, the smell of sweet baklavas,
There was Starbucks & hot tea in all flavours,
but, the 360 rose wine I want to savour!

Clear skies and snow laced ground..
The blue of water & its soothing sound..
a bus ride on the deep blue sea,
and on the deck there was tea!

A delight to see the trojan horse,
& then we advanced to cotton castles ofcourse..
Splendid were the Suji ka halwa in wafers,
& the free 'foreign' langars!

An ancient roman city with a glorious past..
& we were back to the start..
Sunshine replaced snowy days,
the Palace jewels left us in a daze!

On the plane and here now,
the trip was really wow!

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Is it love or is it music?

He stood there in the courtyard, thinking of what life had been and what it held in store for him. A tumultous 2 years had preceeded him, leaving him weary and tired of the world in general. People he'd never really cared for. And when he did, he was let down.

Not knowing where to go, he just stood there.. Stood there thinking what he needed to do next, to set right all the wrongs he'd done...

He found himself a quiet little corner in the dimly lit blue pub. Sipping on a chilled can of strong beer, all he could think of was her..

She was pretty,
a spanish piece
He'd called her Vivacious,
& said shine on you crazy diamond
Her childlike exhuberence,
Yet being comfortably numb
Her Innocence,
yet being another brick in the wall.
she was Compassionate,
& he wish(ed) you were here
She was Courageous,
even when the tigers broke free..

It had been a beautiful relationship from where he could see.. just the perfect one anyone could ever have,

All the moonlit walks,
and the late night talks,
the long drives,
all the right vibes!

She spoke of it as..

all the strangling & mishandling,
the disrespect and cribbing,
the sreams and tears,
being stuck in lie gears..

And so she had shut her out.. out of her life as she started afresh. And here he was, broken.

Had it been good riddance?
Was it a boulevard of broken dreams?
Was it fake plastic?
or was it that he dint know his enemy?

It was over, but was his tragedy?

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Real Music! :P

The head banging heavy metal thing that plays in my house almost every weekend and occasionaly on a weekday has finally given way to real music...

Thank God for the major power cut the other day when i decided to go and watch Tanu weds Manu!Well technically it applies to me.. My hubby's nick name and my childhood name, before I went to school figure in the title! :P

The movie is such a refreshing take on arranged marriages.. I really enjoyed myself, more so cuz I was alone.. free to think and feel whatever I wanted! :) All in all, I'd say an amazing movie for all those thinking of getting married.

So, I'm sitting rolling in laughter, and then suddenly the soundtrack catches my attention! None other than the evergreen Wadali brothers! I loved every bit of the movie after the track played in the background for the rest of it!

The movie has a message for all confused girls at the threshhold of jingling wedding bells! Well, i'd sum it up as: "Decide well in time who you want, else the ending wont be as happy!"

Anyway, I come home and my love for them is renewed.. Renewed because I spent most of 2009 travelling listening to one of their songs on a repeat for 4 hours straight! And mind you I did it religiously, every week I was travelling...

Its magical the world they take you to.. Inexplicable, so go and check it out for yourself..


Also you can download the latest Rangrez mere from the movie itself..

I know you will love it!